Half-Mind Rant Archives




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Too Much Stress? Go Hashing!

Yes, hashing can certainly help you blow off a little steam. But what do you do when physical injury or illness keeps you from enjoying your favorite sport? No, I'm not talking about tendonitis (tennis elbow) keeping you away from your twelve-ounce curls. I'm referring to physical injury that keeps you from that other favorite pastime, hashing.

You could just kick back and lay on the couch watching past episodes on the Playboy Channel. But as an active hasher you would soon tire of that and it wouldn't help the tendonitis one bit. You would want something more; more than the 38DDs that you've been drooling over.

So how do you make the best of your time in recuperation? Notice, I said recuperation, NOT recovery. Recovery is for quitters!

Why not spend some time calling or e-mailing long lost hashers, inviting them back to run with you after your convalescence is ended. This would give you more reason to sit on your backside and allow the healing process to do its job. It would also help the hash regain the numerous members that once thrilled at running around in red dresses. Or, if you're web-talented, offer to lend the web-bastard some assistance. Even driving the beer wagon could offer you the fulfillment that you once derived from hashing.

If you are still ambulatory but not allowed to run, consider setting a pre-laid trail for the hash. A kennel in Pittsburgh claims to run all trails pre-laid. It may not be the "standard" for your hash, but a pre-laid hash trail is better than no trail at all. If your local hash absolutely insists on "Live Trail," then offer to travel to a pre-lay neighboring hash and pre-lay a trail for them. They might enjoy having someone else come in and do the leg work for a change.

If pre-laying isn't your fancy, start walking and scout a trail. Then call up an able-bodied hasher and ask him (or her) join you haring the trail you've scouted. If you're smart, you'll scout out a trail that will afford you the opportunity to shortcut. This will allow you to keep ahead of a running pack. If your group has many walkers (aka Music City H3) your chosen hare can lay the "Eagle" trail and you can lead the walkers on the "Turkey" trail. Sure call it Turkey/Eagle, Hasher/Poofter, or Dog/Puppy, but it's still hashing.

Ok, why rant about this topic? Because I've been unable to run for a fucking month and it's driving me and everyone else in the household crazy. Luckily I've taken my own advice. I've spent a dozen days finding previously unused wooded trails in an area considered hashed out. And I hope that the experienced hashers get tripped up by blindly running down some of the obvious trails used in the past. Call it sneaky, but isn't that part of being a good hare? And it was easy to get someone else to hare the trail. Imagine being handed a trail and not having to have spent days and days scouting. Can life get any better? Well, perhaps getting over the injury would be better.

- Smoking Wiener, Rocket Shitty HHH, Huntsville, Alabama USA

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