On On,
Flying Booger
Hashers have attempted to contact me in the last week regarding my absence from hashing and related social functions. Up to now, I have rebuffed and/or provided vague responses to their inquiries. Communication of that nature is rude. I apologize to any and all who I have offended in that manner. My intention was to stall expressing my opinion concerning a recent event until I could present it in a dignified manner. When angered, some people take a deep breath and slowly count to 10. In my case, I held my breath and counted to 69. It took several tries because I kept passing out before reaching my objective and had to start over. The ethics and morality of many individuals (within the San Diego hash community) are above average. Conditions, which foster a membership with such qualities, include higher educational levels, an honorable military presence combined with the easy going Southern California lifestyle.
People are also social beings, and most have core desires, which include the need for belonging and acceptance by other people and/or groups. I have felt privileged to have found acceptance, love and support within a group of such caliber as mentioned above . . . until now.
On October 4, 2000, I was looking forward to a hash that would mark my one-year anniversary of hashing in the San Diego area. My anticipation increased when I was asked to prepare an illuminated ON-ON sign for that evenings' tequila check (in addition to picking up the food on my way to the start). The food was not ready to be picked up which caused me to be late to the start. Not knowing the run was A to A, I locked my car and set out on an alternate path to rendezvous with the hares. Good News: I found the hares and put the sign up before the pack arrived at the tequila check (within a mile of the end). Bad News: I forgot about the food locked in my car. When I remembered the food, I ran back to my car.
Upon approaching my car with a flashlight I could see handprints along both sides and on the roof. There was no food to be found within. What I did find was a scrap piece of metal and a stick wedged between the window and the passenger door. Shocked and dismayed, I was no longer a member of the hash, but the victim of criminal breaking and entering, vandalism, and burglary. My blackened heart was so filled with retaliatory vengefulness that my only motive to rejoin the pack at that moment would have been to instigate a violent confrontation. The consequences of that option being unacceptable, the only civilized choice was to remove myself from the area.
There is, indeed, such a thing as "mob psychology": it is recognized that there exists a group communal response, which evolved in our ancestors whereby a crowd can become decidedly aggressive and lose all rationality and moral inhibitions.
"The more numerous an assembly may be, of whatever characters composed, the greater is known to be the ascendancy of passion over reason." - Alexander Hamilton.
Upon reflection, the events that night - and a witness who recalls the pack chanting, "break the window, break the window" - reinforce the "mob psychology" assertion. I would like to believe that what transpired did not a directed malice towards myself, but was instead, the result of tired, drunk, hungry hashers.
The following day e-mails were posted touting the success of the run and the great food. Later that day, an e-mail was even posted thanking the perpetrators (by name) for "rescuing the food." The content these listserv messages reveal either ignorance or an unremorseful attitude toward what was most certainly a criminal act.
Most hashes in San Diego share a common membership to a greater or lesser extent. Collectively, I (among others) refer to it as "the big H." Is this what new members can look forward to when participating in the big "H"? Is it hash policy to forfeit one's constitutional rights against criminal acts if a simple mistake is made when one assumes an active role at a hash in San Diego?
Presently, I am of a mind to do what I have observed more experienced hashers do; occasionally show up, do a little shortcutting, drink some beer, ogle the harriettes and go home to probably jerk off. As for my those of you with whom I have established friendships (outside the hash), I look forward to seeing you all again under more pleasant circumstances.
Sincerely,
GayBoy from La Jolla
Dear Gay Boy,
As you know, I was the hare on that night. I was responsible for the criminal act against you, and I have no excuse for my behavior. You are absolutely right on the mark. Without excuses, you must know these things: (1) the general "crowd" at this hash did not know about the proposed breaking in of your car, nor were they chanting "break the window," (2) regretfully, the individuals who did open the car door did it with MY encouragement alone, (although I was unaware of the "tool" just being left in there), (3) I do not believe that this is general hash behavior, but a complete absense of judgment, consideration and compassion on my part, (4) I will take full responsibility for what occurred on that night, both morally and financially.
Please do not blame the hash for my behavior. If there were damages to your property, let's chat about that. More importantly, I fear the damage caused to our friendship may have much deeper wounds. I hope we can repair them in time. This was certainly a wakeup call for me. You are very special to me and so many others, and an important part of this group. It was never my intention to bring even the slightest bit of discomfort to you personally. Complete absense of judgement.
You forgave me for "barking" at you that night, I hope in time you will forgive the rest.
Anonymous
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