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TEXAS INTERHASH 2004-A MUSSEL'S VIEW

 

After the 2003 Texas Interhash in Dripping Springs, we were definitely fired up to sign up for 2004.and the Kiss My Hash (San Antonio) promised to show us all a great time.

OK-last year I got to hand off the Mrs. Texas Interhash title to Flame, as another Austin hash chick exhibited more talent--again! ;-) She lived up to her name swallowing fire...very cool. But she promptly, in hash bimbo style, moved to Germany (following a hash man) so she mailed me back the hat..more to come on that later.

KMH had a venue in Luling, very close to Austin, so we were even more excited about going.  Shortly before it was time for TX IH their venue fell through, so they chose the one Corpus Christi used in 2002: the KOA Kampground at Lake Corpus Christi..certainly a lovely venue, complete with cabins, showers, etc.  But I guess no new hash territory this year.  Texas--the land of landowners and shotguns.

Now onto the weekend.

We gave the Thursday pub crawl a miss as we had "three generations" of Brownie's family in town.I guess a brother and sister are from different generations in Pennsylvania.  And you all thought Texas was strange. So we had a Brownie family pub crawl in the Red River district in Austin..about 6 pubs, bands, red bull/vodka.yeeha!

Nittany Valley graced us with Tutu Fairy, Pippi, and Pork Screw to make sure there was an equal amount of Pennsylvanians vs. Texans.Latecummer from Rumson balanced it all out...

Now, here's the deal: never ever let some Pitt fan/just got home from Iraq/no organizational skills hasher try to organize places for 10 outta towners to stay, shower, etc...not a good idea. We had bodies strewn out all over Austin..but we all managed to get up, get dressed, and get to Texas IH.. 

Friday there was a trail, but we were too late, so we got there just in time for the circle. Poor Deep Throat was trying to run a noisy circle with a battery powered megaphone...pointed either at the ground or at the sky..didn't work so much.  The circle was followed by dinner, and then skits as the band they had arranged had another gig Friday.

Oh my-the skits.. Well, last year the knuckledraggers dressed up as Mexican wrestlers and any skit that remotely sucked, they pounced on and beat the crap out of..HILARIOUS. This year they dressed up as Mexican wrestlers riding flamingos..needless to say, excellent costumes!

The skits were pretty funny..I was on "Beer Factor" and lost as I refused to eat cat food.I just loved the guy, Gin and Juice, I think, that looked at me and said, "I'm gonna win!!!".holding a tin of cat food..and I said, "Yes, you are!"..you see, the prize was beer, and I'm pretty sure I could have beer without eating the cat food..call me a seasoned hasher.. 

After the skits, they had music ala the sound system Dick the Boy Wonder found in the back of his van..I think that thing has a basement just like the Alamo.. Much drinking followed.and then I passed out in my cabin. The cabins at the KOA rocked, by the way!

Saturday there was breakfast at something like Crack-Dawn thirty, so I missed that, but Try A Fuck was to the rescue (for most of us from Austin) with breakfast tacos and I produced some mimosas, so all was well.

Hash Olympics commenced..great spectator sport..izzy dizzy is always entertaining...

And of course, Dicksmith and company were there with the polka music..complete with tent, white picket fence, flowers, and Schnapps..."PLEASE PASS THE SCHNAPPS!!"

Trail was mid-afternoon and was vaguely familiar to those of us who had been there before, but still gorgeous as the weather was clear and the wildflowers were in full bloom..fantastic! I somehow did the trail backwards when trying to shortcut, but ended up at the beer check..then turned around and went back the way I came. CIA was disappointed to learn that we had just missed the Zippy Fat Boy circle, which sounded like it was decidedly better than the regular circle.

Dinner followed and then apparently while I had a shower, they had some sort of ceremony to pick the site for the next TX IH.this usually occurs on Sunday, but these hashers from KMH were trained by alien hashers, so nothing was as expected..and San Antonio hash will be doing the next TX IH..OK.at least it's not Austin.

I came back out and the band was getting started-SKUNKWEED ROCKS!!!!!!

During the break, the Mr. and Mrs. TX IH contests commenced. It was refreshing to see it going back to basics, as opposed to the strip club atmosphere of previous years. The Mr. Texas was a bit confusing, but finally went to Gaylord Fokker from the knuckledraggers after it was originally awarded to Boss Hogg..a nearby landowner turned hasher. Gaylord, you can join me in leaving the Susan Lucci club! Congrats..

As for Mrs. TX IH, it all boiled down to a burp vs. guzzle, with guzzling skills winning out!  Horses Ass from San Antonio took home the hat!

The Mr. and Mrs. Nude went to Donut Holer from Houston and Rotton Cherry from Corpus Christi...

Skunkweed played after.. SKUNKWEED ROCKS!!!!!!  www.skunkweed.com 

One item of note...the sky was extremely clear and it was an absolutely gorgeous  view..incredible sunset followed by a starry night.I had to stop and just gawk at the sky several times during the evening.just beautiful.

Sunday was weird. I woke up again after breakfast again.only to be saved by TAF with his mega-breakfast-yummy!  As I walked out of my cabin towards the general meeting area..around 10:30am, I noticed that everyone was quiet.no sign of any hangover hash whatsoever. HOW COULD THAT BE???!!! That's the time you get to say goodbye to all your friends and chat about upcoming events..usually pick the next TX IH, etc. WHAT!? THEY TOOK THE BEER? I was dumbfounded...

All in all, a great weekend except for the Sunday part...

See you all in San Antonio next year!!!

 



On On!

She Mussel Bitch



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